The First Conversation

The First Conversation

                                                      The First Conversation
           I gather all the courage I have and finally make a call to my crush for the first time. I am nervous, I am scared, I am excited, and I am tensed. My heart is beating at an unbelievable rate. My mind is blank, but my heart is filled with emotions. The first ring, and I can sense the sweat beads appearing on my forehead. 
But thankfully she picks the call at the second ring. was she expecting a call from me, I will never know. I will never ever ask her. 
         But in this moment, I say a meek hello and stupidly ask, "hey, remember me?"  (Of course she does, u idiot)..fortunately she answers with a confident one and says "of course, i do" (and then I can almost hear my heart and brain fighting. Heart says, "I told u she has a thing for u." Brain says, "as if she has nothing better to do." and then I tell them, "shut up u both. let me talk." They diligently obey)
          But on the positive side, she's confident and makes good talk. I finally gain back my confidence gradually. And now I am my original self. The master of communication. The wisdom king. The champion of silly but humorous one liners. Now I start making sense. I make her smile, I make her laugh. I feel like the king of the world. I want the moment to stop right there. (brain interrupts, "dude, not possible according to the fundamental laws of physics..!!" wtf)
        Finally, time to disconnect the call. And even though I have been the champion "loveguru" to all my friends, now I want to express my feelings to her. I want to say "I love you. I always did. I always will. Just be mine. Give me a chance and allow me to show you how much I love you." but I actually end up saying something which sounds like, "we can be friends, right?" (bloody coward) and when she says yes, the word matters to me more than the sentence "I love you too". 
       I am in love. I am so much in love. And i know i am damned cause she seems too good for me. But for the  moment, I don't want to think too much. I just want to bask in the success of my first move. Finally I managed to talk to her. Finally I was able to break the ice and shed away all my inhibitions. But yes, I do love her. I just wish someday I gather enough courage to express it to her. But that story will be some other day...